First of all, PAT K. was very quick to send in the following, saying :-
"Comments on work-16th June-Too much information causing visual overloading and repetition. Two or three paintings in each.When divided into smaller sections they work. Work done after 16th
No. 1 The fluency is better-It has a fresher feel and I feel is not overworked. Perhaps still a degree of overloading.
No. 2 Again overworked but attempt made to reduce content-review as work in progress.
No. 3 Simple blocks of colour -again overworked and composition dominated by dark section
I quite like the soft muted colours-again work in progress!
Will continue to address these issues!"
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| Pat no. 1 |
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| Pat no. 2 |
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| Pat no. 3 |
Pat, you've worked really hard on these issues, I can see that!
I like no. 1 very much. It has a freshness and crispness, a fluency, as you say. That dark shape in the middle is possibly a bit too isolated. It's not too strong, it's struggling because there isn't enough strength around it to support it. The crispness on the right hand side works hard to try and do this, but it all gets a bit weak tonally at the bottom. HOWEVER, you have done a really good job of thinking about your separate areas, and the specific colour choices at the bottom are very encouraging. The main thing that you have regained here is the use of your sparkly whites, which give a brilliance and life to the whole thing.
No. 2 is a bit overworked maybe, as you say. I like the idea of the small space of clear yellow emerging through everything else. I also really like the obvious painterliness of the brush strokes - very Ivon Hitchens! However, make sure you don't use that same flat brush too much - the width of that stroke you've used for the 'windows' is a bit repetitive elsewhere.
No. 3 I actually feel is the most complete in its thinking about the placing of tone AND colour. As you say, it's maybe a bit overworked and it's lost that freshness, but....your areas of colour and tone make sense. There is a tendency in the other two for the main 'ground' to be grey, with accents of colour, wheras this one feels like all the sections speak to each other as equal partners. Even all the neutral, more muted areas are a slightly different mix, giving them a relative 'colour'.
So... all much better! If you could combine the thinking in no. 3 with the freshness in no. 1, you'll be on your way! That's your challenge to move forwards.
Then ELIZABETH has contributed the following :- "This is a bit of a mixed bag. I had intended to carry on the theme of windows but felt uninspired by those around me! I feel that I have got to do something that has a hook. "Mary in the garden" is a figure against squares and the nebulas shapes of plants, "Monday evening" is again figures against oblong and squares I and reflections in glass panels, "Time passing" is a square oblongs and triangles against plant form so I suppose I have stuck to a theme. I like the last one best although I have left out a lot and altered things a great deal. It is a bit tidier than the others! I will get back to windows. I have redone my original one that I showed you last time some things in it are better and some worse! "
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| Elizabeth "Mary in the Garden" |
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| Elizabeth "Monday Evening" |
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| Elizabeth - "Time passing" |
Elizabeth, I think the most telling thing, actually, is your description of the paintings. You are obviously very aware of the abstract possibilities in the compositions, set against the more representational/figurative elements. That's really great. It creates a dynamic quality of being able to feed off the paintings on several levels, and that adds richness and interest. Well done.
'Time Passing' has all those elements that we know and love in your work - the pattern-making and clever drawing, along with recognisable elements that invite a sort of dream-like quality. Having said all that, I think 'Mary in the garden' is very lovely in its romantic softness. The description of the plants is there, but in such a way that it supports the drawing of the figure, and doesn't overwhelm it. I really like the way the figure has been left black and white, surrounded by gentle colour.
'Monday Evening' is clever, but a bit more muddled. All the little stabs of dark make it look a bit cluttered, and it doesn't have the refinement of nos. 1 and 3. All that you say about 'altering' and 'leaving out' in no. 3 would be good to apply to no. 2 a little more. It is very satisfying once you feel empowered to do this sort of thing.
So, your task moving on is to try and do more of that - less is more. It doesn't mean that things have to be empty. They can still have lots of stuff going on,/layers of meaning etc. But those layers are more elegant.
I believe plans are afoot for some of you to meet up on August 4th and draw - great.
Whether you are part of that gang or not, do please send in some work (via e-mail to me), by the 6th August, and I will put it together. Anything you've done between now and then will be welcome.
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